In about 12 hours I will be on a plane back to the States to visit friends and family. Preparing for the journey back causes a wave of reminiscing. I look back on this year and all my brain can come up with to sum up the bulk of everything is; crazy life, crazy people, crazy God.
This year has been filled with incredible struggle and heart ache. But just the same, insane joy, reward, adventure, confusion, and worship. My crazy God has brought me to meet so many amazing people this year. Through that, I was able to experience so much- playing in music festivals and gigs, helping start a church, having the chance to impact thousands of young people through school assemblies and such, mentoring and building relationships with incredible youth who I love with all my heart, starting a transitional housing program with Oceans of Mercy, and making lots of new friends who are a part of my new community here.
Life really is a crazy thing to live. I have learned so much this year and am so thankful to God for leading me(sometimes dragging me) through it. I cannot wait to see my family and friends so soon! That I will admit, has been my deepest struggle here is the distance between my family. It will be so good to hang out with them in person and cram everything we possibly can into the next month! I will also, miss my life here. I will miss playing ad singing sunday mornings with the musical worship team for services. I will miss experiencing the progress and growth of our church and its people. I will miss seeing the life change in those our ministry touches. I will miss the girls in the transitional house who I have been living with for over the past four months and have come to love so much. I will miss my friends and family here and the beauty of this country. Thankfully, I will be returning to continue ministry here next year.
To be called, is to live a crazy life with crazy people, while serving a crazy God. My prayer is to never get caught up in the "what if's" (i.e. what if this happens…)of fear, and live constantly in the "what is…" (God is my rock, my strength, my joy,etc…)of God's love. Merry Christmas everyone! Thank you for all your prayers and support through this eventful year. Blessings
Thursday, 26 December 2013
Monday, 2 December 2013
Summertime Christmas
It's a strange thing (for me) to walk in shorts on a hot sunny day through a shopping center filled with plastic trees, metallic tinsel and a Santa inappropriately dressed for snow. Growing up in Carmichael, California, our Christmas took place during winter. To me, Christmas represented cold rainy days, and nights spent dreamily gazing at the lights and ornaments on our Christmas tree as we huddled around our wood stove. Don't get me wrong, I love the weather here in Port Elizabeth. There is only really but two seasons; a not-so-hot one and a hot-most-of-the-time one. In the morning it could be stormy and grey, then come afternoon it could be hot and sticky. You really never know what to expect. But it just doesn't feel the same for me (obviously). I guess that has been a bit hard.
As this year comes to an end, the distance between me and family/friends becomes harder and harder to bear. I have lived here for a year now. Thus far in life, I have not experienced such peace in my daily life. I love South Africa and I love what Jesus helps me do here. But my heart is stilled pulled between two parts of the world. This will be my first Christmas without family. Although I do get to see everyone a few days later I will still be here for Christmas without them. And I try to not let my heart hurt, but it never really gets easier with time. But in all fairness, those gaps that family helps to fill won't ever be truly full until I go to live with Jesus in my true home forever.
Things at the house are going okay. Always interesting, always something going on. I have so much love and respect for what these girls have done in the past month. One of the women who stays there has been working at a call center arranging appointments for a cab service who keeps drunk drivers off the road. She has had to overcome incredible circumstances such as: not having any prior skills with computers, horrible treatment, from her manager, and working the night shift. Keep in mind this is her first job! From her background, she has really been thrown into the deep end. Even so, Roxy has been strong and is moving forward! She has a strong heart and the beauty of Jesus shines through her.
Only 25 days till I depart to visit everyone in the States! So excited to see everyone. Love and miss you all. Have to go now, will post more updates later on. Blessings!
As this year comes to an end, the distance between me and family/friends becomes harder and harder to bear. I have lived here for a year now. Thus far in life, I have not experienced such peace in my daily life. I love South Africa and I love what Jesus helps me do here. But my heart is stilled pulled between two parts of the world. This will be my first Christmas without family. Although I do get to see everyone a few days later I will still be here for Christmas without them. And I try to not let my heart hurt, but it never really gets easier with time. But in all fairness, those gaps that family helps to fill won't ever be truly full until I go to live with Jesus in my true home forever.
Things at the house are going okay. Always interesting, always something going on. I have so much love and respect for what these girls have done in the past month. One of the women who stays there has been working at a call center arranging appointments for a cab service who keeps drunk drivers off the road. She has had to overcome incredible circumstances such as: not having any prior skills with computers, horrible treatment, from her manager, and working the night shift. Keep in mind this is her first job! From her background, she has really been thrown into the deep end. Even so, Roxy has been strong and is moving forward! She has a strong heart and the beauty of Jesus shines through her.
Only 25 days till I depart to visit everyone in the States! So excited to see everyone. Love and miss you all. Have to go now, will post more updates later on. Blessings!
Tuesday, 12 November 2013
Roof Hoppers: From Glory to Glory
There comes a time during the night when a silence, a stillness creeps out from its slumbers and beckons to be broken. Teenagers seem to have a sixth sense of when this time occurs as no hour or minute can notify one of its arrival. So naturally, back then, I had the "brilliant" idea of roof hopping.
Roof-hopping = the act of climbing on top of roofs (mainly school and church buildings as they are the tallest and most deserted) in the dead of night to partake in shannanagans such as dancing, hide-and-seek, making music, and star gazing.
All of us have experienced the thrill that comes from some secretive rule breaking. And so it was, that every now and then I would rally up some friends when it was "time" and we would embark upon this stupidity.
Not only is roof-hopping dangerous, it is also very illegal. With this in mind, we would let our youthful "immortality" override our common sense which would try to talk us down inside our heads. There were a few schools in the area we knew very well. Slinking along in the dark, we would make our way to the "entry points" (all those big electrical boxes or drain pipes that made it an easy-up). As the "oh my gosh we could get in big trouble" factor crept in, we were on full alert with eyes wide and hair raised. Some times cops would pull in the parking lots and check the premises. If we saw them coming in early, we had two choices: stay and hide, or get down and run.
There were a few times where the cops got out of their car and searched the school on foot. More than once, we played a cat and mouse game with them, rarely getting caught. And other times we did get caught; like a shine a flash light, interrogate you, scare you, and threaten to arrest you kind of caught. Somehow, that never seemed to be too much of a threat for us to learn our lesson, we just had to grow out of it. We never did get arrested though!
Looking back, I can see how incredibly stupid all that nonsense was. But, I wouldn't change any of it as I have wonderful memories (fun and scary) of those chaotic adventures.
"But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord." - 2 Corinthians 3:18
Roof-hopping = the act of climbing on top of roofs (mainly school and church buildings as they are the tallest and most deserted) in the dead of night to partake in shannanagans such as dancing, hide-and-seek, making music, and star gazing.
All of us have experienced the thrill that comes from some secretive rule breaking. And so it was, that every now and then I would rally up some friends when it was "time" and we would embark upon this stupidity.
Not only is roof-hopping dangerous, it is also very illegal. With this in mind, we would let our youthful "immortality" override our common sense which would try to talk us down inside our heads. There were a few schools in the area we knew very well. Slinking along in the dark, we would make our way to the "entry points" (all those big electrical boxes or drain pipes that made it an easy-up). As the "oh my gosh we could get in big trouble" factor crept in, we were on full alert with eyes wide and hair raised. Some times cops would pull in the parking lots and check the premises. If we saw them coming in early, we had two choices: stay and hide, or get down and run.
There were a few times where the cops got out of their car and searched the school on foot. More than once, we played a cat and mouse game with them, rarely getting caught. And other times we did get caught; like a shine a flash light, interrogate you, scare you, and threaten to arrest you kind of caught. Somehow, that never seemed to be too much of a threat for us to learn our lesson, we just had to grow out of it. We never did get arrested though!
Looking back, I can see how incredibly stupid all that nonsense was. But, I wouldn't change any of it as I have wonderful memories (fun and scary) of those chaotic adventures.
"But we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord." - 2 Corinthians 3:18
The first part of this verse talks about the change that happens when we meet Jesus. "Open face" means that God has taken the veil away form our eyes and has given us understanding. The second part means that once that has happened, it is as if we look into a mirror (a glass) and see Jesus because He is reflected in us "by His Spirit". And the third part of this verse describes the continual change in us from natural to super-natural beings as we allow God's Spirit to fill us. He changes us and takes us "from glory to glory." If we continue to allow God to have full control over our lives and decisions, He will never change us in a way that is bad. He will only take us from "roof" to "roof". Sometimes the way God changes us is so intense we sometimes never even attempt to climb onto the roof. Sometimes, we get too scared and climb down, never able to experience the glory and awesomeness And sometimes, we make bad decisions and those pull us down from the roof, down from experiencing God's good changes grace, and blessings. What keeps us moving "from glory to glory"; hopping from roof to roof?
In those days, there was always one person in the group who was always too scared and too smart to be coerced into our endeavors. In the end, we usually didn't go (probably for the best), so that they wouldn't be left behind. As humans, things that are super-natural frighten us because we are naturally natural (lol) before God enters our lives. I encourage you to see the fear as a healthy awe of God's greatness and to have it act as an enticement to pull you onto that roof and into His glory.
Those stories are not examples of things one should do but just stories of stupid things I did that you shouldn't do. : )
Here's a few updates on my life and the mission house:
- The discipleship house I run is undergoing a lot of changes in its program
- It will now be a "transitional house" (90 days to get in, get it, and get out)
- House is not available to those in the program from 800-1600hrs
- Girls who are a part of the program must be looking for work or studying during those hours
- Business cards and phone numbers of places applied must be brought to me at the end of the day so I can check in and provide further information to employers
Monday, 21 October 2013
What's My Name Again?
"We do not need the grace of God to withstand crises—human nature and pride are sufficient for us to face the stress and strain magnificently. But it does require the supernatural grace of God to live twenty-four hours of every day as a saint, going through drudgery, and living an ordinary, unnoticed, and ignored existence as a disciple of Jesus. It is ingrained in us that we have to do exceptional things for God—but we do not. We have to be exceptional in the ordinary things of life, and holy on the ordinary streets, among ordinary people—and this is not learned in five minutes." -Oswald Chambers
The quote above is from My Utmost For His Highest, the daily devotion I go through every morning. When I first started going "all-out" for Jesus, I was fueled by the exciting courage and boldness that came with my newly found security in Christ. I would wake up and throughout the day pray stuff like "God, give me the awesome strength in faith to do extraordinary things for you and your children." In my head, these things looked like healing blind and disabled people, preaching the gospel to masses of people and watching them surrender under the amazing love of Christ, entire schools changing with Godly influence, stone hearts melting... you know like the crazy warrior type stuff that is all over the bible.
The past two weeks have been really hard. Without going into too much depth I was feeling unnoticed, ignored, and unappreciated. I repented countless times apologizing for something my heart, my flesh, longed for. But it was like a growing scab on my lungs; making me breathe heavy when my thoughts lingered on the hurt inside me. I knew that I should need not even the sunlight if I had the love of God inside me for He can and will satisfy my every need if I let Him. But it wouldn't go.
Then, I read this morning's devotion and my prayers changed.
"God, give me the strength to be ordinary, to go unnoticed, to be ignored."
"Discipleship is built entirely on the supernatural grace of God. Walking on water is easy to someone with impulsive boldness, but walking on dry land as a disciple of Jesus Christ is something altogether different. Peter walked on the water to go to Jesus, but he “followed Him at a distance” on dry land (Mark 14:54)."
To God, we are extraordinary. He notices us and thinks of us all the time and appreciates everything big and small we do because He knows our hearts and sees everything. I am learning that to live in the ordinary, unnoticed, with extraordinary love is much harder than if I were to walk on water.
Hope everyone is doing well- love y'all. Be blessed today!
Tuesday, 15 October 2013
I Love You Because You Suck….
In bible college they teach you about the total depravity of man. Simply put, this is the understanding that man without God is capable of nothing good in word, thought, or deed. When one grasps this, it is impossible not to gravitate to complete humility. Looking back, we say and hear phrases all the time that start with "God loves me despite my…". I have thought nothing of it until this weekend.
Friday and Saturday, all of the Westside Family Church staff (all 6 of us!) and some of our leaders attended the Leadership Summit Simulcast. We were blessed with teachings from the top leaders all over the world. One of the speakers(don't have my notes with me so I can't tell you their name- sorry!) talked about finding someone who loves you because of your faults and imperfections and not despite them. And then I thought about Jesus and how it is wrong to say He loves us despite our faults and imperfections. God is so much bigger than despite. Loving someone because they're imperfect is so much more significant than loving someone despite their imperfections.
God created us with His loving breath and therefore knew/knows all that we would/will screw up. There is so much power behind knowing that He loves us because we are who we are, and not that He loves us even though we suck.
This has been an awesome and exciting thing for me to put into practice. Our responsibility as Christ followers is to love people. Now, I constantly question myself, "Am I loving this person in spite of their baggage, or am I loving them because they have it?" This really gives your heart some incredible perspective on how we go about loving people outwardly and inwardly.
Prayer Request: One of the women who lives with me is going through and incredible life changing circumstance that she is not yet prepared for. Please pray for opportunities to open up for her and for wisdom for myself to lead her through this. -A bit vague but can't share much more details.
Thank you all for your continued support!
Friday and Saturday, all of the Westside Family Church staff (all 6 of us!) and some of our leaders attended the Leadership Summit Simulcast. We were blessed with teachings from the top leaders all over the world. One of the speakers(don't have my notes with me so I can't tell you their name- sorry!) talked about finding someone who loves you because of your faults and imperfections and not despite them. And then I thought about Jesus and how it is wrong to say He loves us despite our faults and imperfections. God is so much bigger than despite. Loving someone because they're imperfect is so much more significant than loving someone despite their imperfections.
God created us with His loving breath and therefore knew/knows all that we would/will screw up. There is so much power behind knowing that He loves us because we are who we are, and not that He loves us even though we suck.
This has been an awesome and exciting thing for me to put into practice. Our responsibility as Christ followers is to love people. Now, I constantly question myself, "Am I loving this person in spite of their baggage, or am I loving them because they have it?" This really gives your heart some incredible perspective on how we go about loving people outwardly and inwardly.
Prayer Request: One of the women who lives with me is going through and incredible life changing circumstance that she is not yet prepared for. Please pray for opportunities to open up for her and for wisdom for myself to lead her through this. -A bit vague but can't share much more details.
Thank you all for your continued support!
Tuesday, 8 October 2013
10 Ways To Love
I haven't had much time with internet to update y'all on anything. Things have been going around the same speed here. I have a few school assemblies this week. The youth has been growing in our church which is really awesome! Next week we will have a total of around 10 students attending our life group. Please pray that God will bring youth leaders to come along side and lead with me. Also if you all could pray for the health of my household. Myself, and the girls are struggling in this area. None of us have health insurance either. The list below is on a piece of paper I put up in our house. As easy as the below reads, it does not translate with how easy they are to live out. I struggle and strive to apply these to my relationships and interactions with others. Thought they might be some eye opening and heart opening things to try out.
1.Listen without interrupting. (Proverbs 18)
2.Speak without accusing. (James 1:19)
3.Give without sparing. (Proverbs 21:26)
4.Pray without ceasing. (Colossians 1:9)
5.Answer without arguing. (Proverbs 17:1)
6.Share without pretending. (Ephesians 4:15)
7.Enjoy without complaint. (Philippians 2:14)
8.Trust without wavering. (Corinthians 13:7)
9.Forgive without punishing. (Colossians 3:13)
10.Promise without forgetting. (Proverbs 13:12)
Hope everyone is well. I love and miss you all! More updates to come soon as next week will be slightly less busy.
1.Listen without interrupting. (Proverbs 18)
2.Speak without accusing. (James 1:19)
3.Give without sparing. (Proverbs 21:26)
4.Pray without ceasing. (Colossians 1:9)
5.Answer without arguing. (Proverbs 17:1)
6.Share without pretending. (Ephesians 4:15)
7.Enjoy without complaint. (Philippians 2:14)
8.Trust without wavering. (Corinthians 13:7)
9.Forgive without punishing. (Colossians 3:13)
10.Promise without forgetting. (Proverbs 13:12)
Hope everyone is well. I love and miss you all! More updates to come soon as next week will be slightly less busy.
Thursday, 26 September 2013
Pictures
Holiday break arts and crafts with the kiddos from Wells Estate
arts and crafts at the Soyama community center
kids waiting in line to get their meal for the day
Wednesday, 18 September 2013
The Lord Is My Inheritance
“The priests, the Levites—all the tribe of Levi—shall have no part nor inheritance with Israel; they shall eat the offerings of the Lord made by fire, and His portion. Therefore they shall have no inheritance among their brethren; the Lord is their inheritance, as He said to them." -Deuteronomy 18:1-2
God has been encouraging me with the reminder that through any and all circumstances He is my inheritance. The people God created for full-time service to Him (the Levites- one of the tribes of Israel), God has chosen to give the least physically to. I think this is a brilliant way for God to keep His servants close and dependent upon Him. It causes them to lack physically but be rich spiritually. In our sunday services we have been going through the book of Philippians in a series called "Perspective"(http://westsidefamily.co.za/listen/index.html). Last Sunday we studied ch.4 and how the state of being content is actually something learned. I am not saying that I am going through incredibly harsh times- I am busy and do have daily challenges but I am always trying to keep my focus more on Christ and less on what is going on around me. And again God brought me to read through Lamentations 3. Wow- Must read this chapter! Jeremiah does the strangest thing. He lists and mourns over all the terrible things God has punished Israel with and then in the midst of it He praises God for His faithful love. Being content is a choice we make. Through all the ups and downs of this last week God has been helping to choose joy in Him. Regardless of what's going on around me, "I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”" - Lamentations 3:24
(sorry my thoughts are all over but just an update on what God is doing in me love you all!)
God has been encouraging me with the reminder that through any and all circumstances He is my inheritance. The people God created for full-time service to Him (the Levites- one of the tribes of Israel), God has chosen to give the least physically to. I think this is a brilliant way for God to keep His servants close and dependent upon Him. It causes them to lack physically but be rich spiritually. In our sunday services we have been going through the book of Philippians in a series called "Perspective"(http://westsidefamily.co.za/listen/index.html). Last Sunday we studied ch.4 and how the state of being content is actually something learned. I am not saying that I am going through incredibly harsh times- I am busy and do have daily challenges but I am always trying to keep my focus more on Christ and less on what is going on around me. And again God brought me to read through Lamentations 3. Wow- Must read this chapter! Jeremiah does the strangest thing. He lists and mourns over all the terrible things God has punished Israel with and then in the midst of it He praises God for His faithful love. Being content is a choice we make. Through all the ups and downs of this last week God has been helping to choose joy in Him. Regardless of what's going on around me, "I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in him!”" - Lamentations 3:24
(sorry my thoughts are all over but just an update on what God is doing in me love you all!)
Thursday, 12 September 2013
Another Update
Yesterday was my birthday. I had a wonderful day! Was a bit different celebrating with newer faces but I love the friends I have made here. I had some really good Jesus time and God brought it to my attention that I was neglecting my personal worship of Him. Yes, I have my quiet prayer/study time every morning/day. Yes, me and Jesus chat throughout the day. But God has made me to worship Him not only through living but especially through music. I realized that I was publicly worshiping through music(singing/playing instruments) during assemblies, ministry, sunday services etc. but neglecting my personal worship. The public stuff is supposed to come from an outflow of your personal worship. I was becoming a full-time public worshipper but only a part-time personal one. I was beginning to lose my spiritual edge (my passion/closeness with Jesus). Thankfully Jesus didn't allow this to happen for long but even in the span of a week or so there were things where I became spiritually blind to because of it. Don't have much else to say, but maybe ask yourself if you have neglected any of your personal worship with God- it probably looks different than mine as not everyone connects with God by singing or playing to Him. Have you become a part-time anything with Jesus? Much love to you all and thank you for all the birthday wishes!
Tuesday, 3 September 2013
Neighbors
Walmer Location/Township
Yesterday I went with a few friends to help out with their soup club they have just started in the Walmer location. Walmer is a suburb in Port Elizabeth (city I live in). There are two common names for these settlements: location, and township. There are over 6 of these locations in my city. In the pictures above you can see their houses. All made from scrap tin, wood, plastic, anything really. Dirt floors, no heating/air conditioning even electricity. Many without running water. When the rain comes, most of these houses flood making everything and everybody wet and muddy. Of course, some houses are a little nicer than others and have running water or electricity that they tap into. The kids and people have hardly any clothing most in the only what they have torn and dirty. Many go with broken shoes and many with none at all. Aside from lack of clothing many kids go without food for days, sometimes they get one meal a day. Usually, that meal is bread, pap, porridge, or potatoes (carbs or starch). I see kids with bloated bellies from malnutrition. This place is about a 10 min walk from my house. My neighbors are starving.
I have heard stories from young girls who's parents have died or left them and they are now forced to take care of their brothers and sisters. These girls are ages 13-16. Because they can't work they sell their bodies every day for food and money. My neighbors are hurting.
Sometimes, I can go a few days with out feeling compassion for people in these circumstances as I get busy and forget what they suffer. I live in a nice house, in a nice area. If I am always on the go, even though I may interact and pray with people who live there I still can be non-understanding when I forget how they live. Poverty is an interesting thing here. A mindset that few seem to be able to break. Circumstances that no one did anything to inherit; they were just born.
Everything is so segregated. One just has to travel a few min in any directions and you will see nice houses, paved roads, -wealth. Wealth is really all in perspective. Yesterday I heard two little kids go nuts over the fact that one of them had R9 (R10=$1). To the kids, you were rich if you had R9. To me, that is poverty. A kid gets a new pair of shoes- something his feet have never felt. He feels wealth. Many of us have the decision of choosing which shoes to wear in the morning.
My heart breaks. And many times like today, I feel helpless. I can do so little. I am so little. The great hope in this is that my God, is a big God. He can do big things. I didn't write this entry to make anyone pity anyone. I just wanted to give people some perspective. The best thing for the western culture to try and uproot it from apathetic complacency is to get some perspective on life. As you finish reading this I encourage all of you to ask God for some perspective. It could change your life on so many different levels. Apathy hardens our hearts to stop feeling for our neighbors. Matthew 22:39. We suck at one of the two most important things Jesus commands of us.
Here is a few facts for some perspective:
- There are 164.8 million needy children in the world.
- 11 million starve to death or die from preventable diseases
- 8.5 million work as child slaves, prostitutes, or under horrible conditions
- 2.3 million live with HIV
- 2.1 BILLION people on this planet claim to be Christians
- If just 8 percent of us "Christians" cared for one more child, there would be NO STATISTICS LEFT.
So… are we loving our neighbors?
(facts above taken from Kisses From Katie)
Thursday, 29 August 2013
Just An Update
Haven't had much time with internet this week. I don't have any long entry for y'all just a quick update.
Honestly things have been rough at home. I have been dealing with "stuff" with the girls and now understand how single parents feel. God is really teaching me a lot about what playing the parent role is. My good friend Sue (also their counselor) has been giving me advice on what appropriate disciplinary actions are and how to reinforce my "authority". Things get complicated with discipline because they are adults so I have been approaching everything very carefully. Although God has given me a heart for mothering, it doesn't make the job any easier. A lot of you moms who are reading this are probably going "tell me about it!" But remember,- this is all very new to me! God has been really testing me, growing me, and challenging me through these past two weeks. Although I don't struggle with material possessiveness, God has been breaking down every ounce of care for anything I could even see as "mine". "My" clothes, shoes, food, money, guitar, all of that, I had been previously labeling as "my things" in my head. With recent situations and such God is really pounding out me even calling them "mine". Everything is God's. We may or may not acknowledge that.
This morning I took the older of the two ladies, to a skills training center. What an incredible facility/program they have! As soon as we sort through some paper work she will be enrolled there as a student. Upon completion of her training (12-16 months), she can either try and get a job or further her education in university. She is so very excited and I am as well! I am so proud of the progress she has made in the past two weeks. I can't wait to see what brilliant things God will do with her future.
Please continue to pray for me as God is bringing me into a season where things get "messy". Things have been difficult and I know that this is only the beginning. This is probably all jumbled and may not make sense but I just wanted to through a quick update on things for all those supporting and keeping up with adventures here. Be blessed! I know I am.
Honestly things have been rough at home. I have been dealing with "stuff" with the girls and now understand how single parents feel. God is really teaching me a lot about what playing the parent role is. My good friend Sue (also their counselor) has been giving me advice on what appropriate disciplinary actions are and how to reinforce my "authority". Things get complicated with discipline because they are adults so I have been approaching everything very carefully. Although God has given me a heart for mothering, it doesn't make the job any easier. A lot of you moms who are reading this are probably going "tell me about it!" But remember,- this is all very new to me! God has been really testing me, growing me, and challenging me through these past two weeks. Although I don't struggle with material possessiveness, God has been breaking down every ounce of care for anything I could even see as "mine". "My" clothes, shoes, food, money, guitar, all of that, I had been previously labeling as "my things" in my head. With recent situations and such God is really pounding out me even calling them "mine". Everything is God's. We may or may not acknowledge that.
This morning I took the older of the two ladies, to a skills training center. What an incredible facility/program they have! As soon as we sort through some paper work she will be enrolled there as a student. Upon completion of her training (12-16 months), she can either try and get a job or further her education in university. She is so very excited and I am as well! I am so proud of the progress she has made in the past two weeks. I can't wait to see what brilliant things God will do with her future.
Please continue to pray for me as God is bringing me into a season where things get "messy". Things have been difficult and I know that this is only the beginning. This is probably all jumbled and may not make sense but I just wanted to through a quick update on things for all those supporting and keeping up with adventures here. Be blessed! I know I am.
Wednesday, 21 August 2013
Dumpster Diving; I Am My Father's Daughter
I will now proceed to tell tales of my younger days... please excuse the stupidity.
We were experts. The craft: dumpster diving.
We knew all the sweet spots; where we can find this and that; the good and the not-so-good. When the clock hit 11 or 12 we would head out- the less amount of people who saw, the less awkward (also because it is illegal in California). It seriously is incredible what people will throw out! Don't worry, I am not a hoarder. One time, I found multiple untouched boxes of biscuit mix. After testing them out (they were great!) me and some friends baked them and gave them out to our homeless friends who happily chowed them. Another time, I found a bag of the best tangerines I've had- to this day- and a box of dog treats for my pups! Okay, the tangerines were laying next to the dumpster in a box, but still! I have also found this big rolling energy drink cooler that my friend now uses for parties and get togethers. Oh! And my favorite was when we found this huge 5' 5" tractor tire and decided to push it up a flight of stairs and let go... it took on incredible speed and with a couple leaping bounds smashed into a few rows of baking trays. We did not intend to bowl, but if we were keeping score, it was one of the coolest and scariest "strikes" I have seen. I don't remember the first time I got the idea to try my luck in this trade, but I know that I got the mentality from my dad.
My dad is one of the most creatively useful people I know. He owns just about every tool imaginable and is a "saver" (nice word because my parents read my blog-love you dad!); the perfect combination for creatio ex nihilo- a latin theological term meaning "creation out of nothing." For example, one Christmas Eve he erected this long pole he made out of pieces of PVC pipe with an old sprinkler head fixed to the top and a hose attached to the bottom. He left it on over night and in the morning we had a beautiful "white Christmas" in our back yard with a tree full of huge icicles. That gift was close competition with the material presents under the Christmas tree. Come summer, the contraption would serve as one heck of a mister on a hot summer day as well. He is a painter by trade, and so he would save all of the extra paint from his jobs. Our roof had a lot of leaks and so every winter we would try to re-patch the roof with the old paint to try and fight off some of the rain. -What a sight our roof must have been from the air! Or one time, he built us a little fort next to the wood pile out of an old garage door, bean bag game(he used the little whole for a window), and used carpet. He's crafty like that. And of course, I am my father's daughter… so naturally, I make furniture for my house out of scrap wood, free paint, and bricks I found, or a coffee table out of old tires. Point being, cool thing come out of a dumpster.
As I was hit by nostalgia the other night, accidentally day dreaming through prayer, Jesus reeled me back in by 'saying', "Yeah, that's what I do." So true! We start off generally clean in life, and somewhere along the way we decide to jump in the dumpster and we sift through the trash and sin and darkness looking for something, -really anything worth grabbing on to. Then, Jesus comes along and puts out His hand. And once we are smart enough to take His help, He pulls us out. He finds that "gem" in all the mess. Through our brokenness we become aware of how in need of a Redeemer, a Creator, a Re-Creator we are. The rad thing is that God only makes beauty. He also never wastes a hurt or bad decision. He's crafty like that. So what happens to us? We become useful. We become beauty.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!" 2 Corinthians 5:17
We were experts. The craft: dumpster diving.
We knew all the sweet spots; where we can find this and that; the good and the not-so-good. When the clock hit 11 or 12 we would head out- the less amount of people who saw, the less awkward (also because it is illegal in California). It seriously is incredible what people will throw out! Don't worry, I am not a hoarder. One time, I found multiple untouched boxes of biscuit mix. After testing them out (they were great!) me and some friends baked them and gave them out to our homeless friends who happily chowed them. Another time, I found a bag of the best tangerines I've had- to this day- and a box of dog treats for my pups! Okay, the tangerines were laying next to the dumpster in a box, but still! I have also found this big rolling energy drink cooler that my friend now uses for parties and get togethers. Oh! And my favorite was when we found this huge 5' 5" tractor tire and decided to push it up a flight of stairs and let go... it took on incredible speed and with a couple leaping bounds smashed into a few rows of baking trays. We did not intend to bowl, but if we were keeping score, it was one of the coolest and scariest "strikes" I have seen. I don't remember the first time I got the idea to try my luck in this trade, but I know that I got the mentality from my dad.
My dad is one of the most creatively useful people I know. He owns just about every tool imaginable and is a "saver" (nice word because my parents read my blog-love you dad!); the perfect combination for creatio ex nihilo- a latin theological term meaning "creation out of nothing." For example, one Christmas Eve he erected this long pole he made out of pieces of PVC pipe with an old sprinkler head fixed to the top and a hose attached to the bottom. He left it on over night and in the morning we had a beautiful "white Christmas" in our back yard with a tree full of huge icicles. That gift was close competition with the material presents under the Christmas tree. Come summer, the contraption would serve as one heck of a mister on a hot summer day as well. He is a painter by trade, and so he would save all of the extra paint from his jobs. Our roof had a lot of leaks and so every winter we would try to re-patch the roof with the old paint to try and fight off some of the rain. -What a sight our roof must have been from the air! Or one time, he built us a little fort next to the wood pile out of an old garage door, bean bag game(he used the little whole for a window), and used carpet. He's crafty like that. And of course, I am my father's daughter… so naturally, I make furniture for my house out of scrap wood, free paint, and bricks I found, or a coffee table out of old tires. Point being, cool thing come out of a dumpster.
As I was hit by nostalgia the other night, accidentally day dreaming through prayer, Jesus reeled me back in by 'saying', "Yeah, that's what I do." So true! We start off generally clean in life, and somewhere along the way we decide to jump in the dumpster and we sift through the trash and sin and darkness looking for something, -really anything worth grabbing on to. Then, Jesus comes along and puts out His hand. And once we are smart enough to take His help, He pulls us out. He finds that "gem" in all the mess. Through our brokenness we become aware of how in need of a Redeemer, a Creator, a Re-Creator we are. The rad thing is that God only makes beauty. He also never wastes a hurt or bad decision. He's crafty like that. So what happens to us? We become useful. We become beauty.
"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!" 2 Corinthians 5:17
Monday, 19 August 2013
My Finicky Heart
Last winter/summer (depending on where you live) I took part in an internship for Jabulani Africa Ministries (http://www.jamafrica.org.za) from beginning of June till a bit after August. I had no idea what to expect going to South Africa my first time. As I flew in to Cape Town over the gorgeous mountains, the townships with houses made of trash and tin, my heart melted along with the purple glow of dawn. The journey to this journey was rough. Some complications arose I ended up flying in two week earlier than the team I would be interning with. Looking back, it was much better that way as it allowed God to personally connect with me and South Africa without the distraction of my good friends. I arrived around 6:00am and was immediately immersed in the ministry of JAM- jet lag never had a chance to catch up. We went to a township an hour away from the base- we lived in a WWII army base on the side of a mountain that was set up during the war "just in case". After loving on and sharing the gospel with a butt load of kids who had next to nothing we headed home. My tired mind was flooded with the day's experiences. And then I had THE thought that God planted... "Yeah God, I could live here." Little did I know what BIG things would come from that little thought.
Long story short, Westside Family Church (from Kansas), who I am now helping start an international campus for as their youth ministry director, partnered with JAM to do a youth outreach over the whole of South Africa asked me to come and work for them. Surprised and completely caught off guard, the to-be worship pastor for the South African campus and global impacts pastor for the Kansas one and I prayed every night together for two weeks. And then God said "Go." By then, South Africa had won my heart time and time again with God's beautiful people and languages, the gross worms I ate, cold floors I slept on, paralyzing sunsets, and the immense need for love in a poverty stricken country. And since then, there has been this love affair with my home, and my home.
It is a hard thing to live so far from those you love most. This has been one of my biggest struggles living here. Chatting with Jesus I would battle through the confusion of why He would give me such love for things so far apart. I would live in the joy of obeying God's will of me serving in this beautiful country during the day and long for the joy of being with my loved ones at night. And then, Jesus answered. "No place, no people have your heart. I do."
Hebrews 13:14-21 "For this world is not our home; we are looking forward to our city in heaven, which is yet to come. With Jesus' help, let us continually offer our sacrifice of praise to God by proclaiming the glory of his name. Don't forget to do good and to share what you have with those in need, for such sacrifices are very pleasing to God. Obey your spiritual leaders and do what they say. Their work is to watch over your souls, and they know they are accountable to God. Give them reason to do this joyfully and not with sorrow. That would certainly not be for your benefit. Pray for us, for our conscience is clear and we want to live honorably in everything we do.I especially need your prayers right now so that I can come back to you soon. And now, may the God of peace, who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, all that is pleasing to him. Jesus is the great Shepherd of the sheep by an everlasting covenant, signed with his blood. To him be glory forever and ever. Amen."
My finicky heart gets too needy and full of so many things and people I love to love. Yet, too often I forget to love the One it belongs to, Jesus.
Long story short, Westside Family Church (from Kansas), who I am now helping start an international campus for as their youth ministry director, partnered with JAM to do a youth outreach over the whole of South Africa asked me to come and work for them. Surprised and completely caught off guard, the to-be worship pastor for the South African campus and global impacts pastor for the Kansas one and I prayed every night together for two weeks. And then God said "Go." By then, South Africa had won my heart time and time again with God's beautiful people and languages, the gross worms I ate, cold floors I slept on, paralyzing sunsets, and the immense need for love in a poverty stricken country. And since then, there has been this love affair with my home, and my home.
It is a hard thing to live so far from those you love most. This has been one of my biggest struggles living here. Chatting with Jesus I would battle through the confusion of why He would give me such love for things so far apart. I would live in the joy of obeying God's will of me serving in this beautiful country during the day and long for the joy of being with my loved ones at night. And then, Jesus answered. "No place, no people have your heart. I do."
Hebrews 13:14-21 "For this world is not our home; we are looking forward to our city in heaven, which is yet to come. With Jesus' help, let us continually offer our sacrifice of praise to God by proclaiming the glory of his name. Don't forget to do good and to share what you have with those in need, for such sacrifices are very pleasing to God. Obey your spiritual leaders and do what they say. Their work is to watch over your souls, and they know they are accountable to God. Give them reason to do this joyfully and not with sorrow. That would certainly not be for your benefit. Pray for us, for our conscience is clear and we want to live honorably in everything we do.I especially need your prayers right now so that I can come back to you soon. And now, may the God of peace, who brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, all that is pleasing to him. Jesus is the great Shepherd of the sheep by an everlasting covenant, signed with his blood. To him be glory forever and ever. Amen."
My finicky heart gets too needy and full of so many things and people I love to love. Yet, too often I forget to love the One it belongs to, Jesus.
Monday, 12 August 2013
I Am a Mountain.
"[I]f you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you." - Matthew 17:20
I have been thinking over this verse for the past few weeks. What I have come to realize is that in the past, I have prayed for the faith to move the external mountains in my situations (money, broken car, lack of sleep, ministry). God has recently been showing me that the far bigger mountain to move is, well- me. As I turn my focus inward to my faith, my joys, my desires, my folly, my tendencies to screw up and ask God to help me move those mountains first, the external "mountains" now become tiny hills or just a bumpy road. The biggest wall to break through is my own spiritual barricades. Once I surrender those to God and we work them out, everything else seems easy traveling.
A recent mountain I have been moving :
I came into this new season knowing that it would be difficult. But I think I may have underestimated it just a tad. I am so excited for everything that God has in store but prayers are more than welcomes. My faith is growing wonders even in the first week as I wake up early to seek God for the strength and wisdom to lead us towards Him and to His will. As I am called to be a mother to many I love all that God is teaching me and molding me into. He always does funny things in my life and I love how my first "children" are my own age! God is good and I love where He has me. More to come soon
I have been thinking over this verse for the past few weeks. What I have come to realize is that in the past, I have prayed for the faith to move the external mountains in my situations (money, broken car, lack of sleep, ministry). God has recently been showing me that the far bigger mountain to move is, well- me. As I turn my focus inward to my faith, my joys, my desires, my folly, my tendencies to screw up and ask God to help me move those mountains first, the external "mountains" now become tiny hills or just a bumpy road. The biggest wall to break through is my own spiritual barricades. Once I surrender those to God and we work them out, everything else seems easy traveling.
A recent mountain I have been moving :
- Learning how to lead a household/family
I came into this new season knowing that it would be difficult. But I think I may have underestimated it just a tad. I am so excited for everything that God has in store but prayers are more than welcomes. My faith is growing wonders even in the first week as I wake up early to seek God for the strength and wisdom to lead us towards Him and to His will. As I am called to be a mother to many I love all that God is teaching me and molding me into. He always does funny things in my life and I love how my first "children" are my own age! God is good and I love where He has me. More to come soon
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)